Two years ago

Exactly two years ago, at 11:50 pm, I was laying in a private room at the Mater on level 8.

They always put mums in a private room, after their babies are diagnosed at birth with Down syndrome. I guess it’s so the mothers can cry in private.


Minutes after birth

I didn’t cry until the next morning, when I realised you would be hungry and wanting cuddles, down in special care. I’d sat on my bed alone and stared at the wall for ten hours. I didn’t sleep until you were three days old.

At this time two years ago, I was laying in my bed trying to figure out how the hell my world had just crashed around my feet and I’d lost the little boy I’d dreamed of, for those nine long eventful months.


Parker in Special Care

But I gained infinitely more.

Parker Myles, I couldn’t begin to imagine my life without you in it. The thought makes me tear up. And today, the day you stopped being a baby and became a little boy, I got to stop for a moment and remember that.


The birthday boy with Uncle Dave

I watched you smile and clap listening to the Happy Birthday song, remembering the hospital days when I couldn’t know what it would be like, couldn’t picture this moment through the haze of fear.

You make everyone smile and forget what they are saying mid sentence because you are trying so hard to catch their attention and flash a smile straight from your eyes.
You’re a born show stopper, a truly compassionate and clued in child, and I love every minute of having you for a son.

I woke up this morning and answered my phone.. Your surgery is booked for the 27th next week. 6 small procedures and I know you can handle it.


Parker, 2 years old

You’re a big boy now.

And I promise never to be scared for your future again.

I’ll just create it for us instead.


Recent photo shoot for Wonsie Australia

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